There are a lot of people these days who are curious about BDSM, especially since the best selling book about it sprang into our midst: 50 Shades of Grey.
If you are wondering what BDSM is all about, read on and we may have some answers for you.
What Does BDSM Stand For?
BDSM stands for Bondage, Domination, Sadism and Masochism. Basically, it appeals to people who like a little spanky with their hanky panky, or pain laced with their pleasure. There are those who enjoy inflicting pain or having someone in submission sexually; and those who enjoy being dominated or hurt.
Is BDSM Immoral?
That depends on your idea of morality. Most people believe that anything goes between two consenting adults. That being said, if someone is prone to get carried away during BDSM and cause more pain that what is acceptable to his or her partner, then, yes….this is not only immoral but downright dangerous.
Is BDSM Just Abuse By Another Name?
No. Abuse consists of one person causing hurt and pain on another, unwilling person. Nor is it overtly sexual by nature. In fact, many rapists derive their thrills not from the sex itself, but from the act of domination over an unwilling victim and causing pain.
Are There Different Types of BDSM?
Yes, there are. One type is referred to as “lifestyle” BDSM and the partners in a relationship imbed facets of BDSM into their sexual practices as a regular thing, a way of life.
The other type is basically “kinky” occasional BDSM that people use from time to time, but not on a regular basis with the same partner.
Is BDSM Abnormal?
Like morality, this largely depends on your interpretation of normality. Currently, the consensual opinion of most psychologists is that any sexual behavior that takes place between two willing adults is not abnormal.
What Causes People to Like BDSM?
Why do some people enjoy BDSM and others shrink at the very thought of it? This is a complex matter and not entirely understood. Psychologists believe that heredity might play a part in it, (one could only guess how or why) and that environment, upbringing and education all play a part. Based on research performed by the Kinsey Institute, Cosmopolitan magazine, Time magazine and several European universities, along with other sources; it is estimated that somewhere between 15% and 30% of the population has some sort of BDSM feelings.
Why is There a Stigma Attached to BDSM?
This is probably due mainly to popular misconceptions about BDSM. Another factor is xenophobia, or fear of the unknown. Since the majority of the population hasn’t tried BDSM, it is often feared and viewed with repugnance.
When do BDSM Tendencies Usually Emerge?
According to research, about one-fourth of BDSM practitioners say that they experienced the associated feelings before the age of twelve. On the other hand, a lot of people say that they didn’t feel these tendencies until much later in life, often following a cataclysmic event such as a divorce that brings about much introspection and a close examination of what someone really wants.
If you enjoy BDSM, you should probably simply enjoy it and derive whatever pleasure you can get from it, minus guilt or other negative feelings.
If you haven’t ever tried BDSM but the thought of it titillates and excites you—go for it! Find a willing partner and spread your wings!
